Part 18: Episode Nine: The Return of Sweet Cheeks!

So, what's our next move?

We'll check in with Morgan. He sent Keith to talk to us, and I want to get his thoughts on what happened with Taselli anyway.



Alright, off we go. That guy must have been in better shape than he looked to get over that fence.

Desperate men can sometimes manage things you might think are impossible.



What do you think we'll be doing after that?

We'll poke around and hope he screws up. We're starting from very little and he knows we're after him; it's going to be tough to get our hands on him again.



I don't know. Someone once told me something about what can be accomplished by desperate men.

Ha.



It's good to see you, Sonny. Come over to my desk.

Thanks for sending Keith over to tell me what happened, sir.

I know you worked hard trying to keep that punk Hoffman in jail. What a shame that it was all for naught!

We probably should do a review of our prison protocol in the near future.

It's frustrating when a man does the best job he can do, and some dummy screws it up! I wouldn't trust that tower guard to guard our water fountain!

Yeah, he'd wouldn't be on duty for five minutes before some large Native American gentleman threw it through a window.

So what do you think we should be doing now?

After reviewing the Hoffman file, I think we should take a close look at the black book that was impounded along with his Cadillac. Get it from Russ in the evidence lockup. Check it out, then get back to me. I have some other leads to investigate. When we next meet, I may have some new ideas.

Yes, sir!



I wanted another look at that thing anyway.

Yeah, we only really had time to see the first couple of pages.

There might be more appointments, or even numbers for some of his contacts in there.

Oh, Sonny, I'm sure you can get Marie's number without resorting to that kind of thing.

...



You imagine that Russ must feel like a prisoner inside the tiny, evidence lockup.

Russ says, "What can I do for you, Fly Boy?"

Does EVERYONE have a different stupid nickname for you?

Hey, Russ. Can I see the book from the Hoffman case?

I am having one hell of a time keeping this Hoffman/Taselli thing straight.

Of course you are.



So this is the stuff we saw before.

Yep.

Nothing AT ALL suspicious here. Let's keep going.



Ammo. Ammo?

Ammo.

So he needs to reload so often that he has to remind himself to buy more?

That's a comforting thought.

Anyway, he checked it, so I guess he got the ammo. But hadn't gotten around to N/W Boss or Robert G, whoever those people are.



Now that just takes all the mystery out of things.

So their organization makes use of pimps, too. Interesting.

I have to wonder what kind of discipline is involved here.

No. No, you don't have to wonder that. In fact, I'd prefer it if you didn't.

Anyway, it was very polite of him to keep records of all his criminal activities for us.



I wonder who J. B. is. Apparently he doesn't get discipline or termination.

Poker... that's ringing a bell for some reason.

Let's keep going and see if there's something else.

No, that's it. The rest of the book isn't written in. Must have been a new one.

Great. Now what?

I want to take a look at the gun he had. Russ, can you help us out with that?

Perfect, thank you.

Wow. So... it's a gun. Tremendous.

Well, we have the serial number. That means we can trace it.

Let's take a look at that tag.

The evidence label bears a box marked "Fingerprints," with the initials of Det. Frank Williams, of the Lytton PD Crime Lab.

Good enough?

Yes. Let's go do some research. Thanks, Russ.



Type "fart"!

No.

Oh, come on. It'll be great.

No.

I'll be your best friend!

That's supposed to make me WANT to do it?

Fine. Be boring. Look up Taselli.



Nothing here we didn't know.

Nope, we've got all that already.

...

...

...

...

You... you aren't going to giggle about the nipple thing?

Would you prefer if I did?

...no, I guess not. It's just kind of unsettling that you aren't.

No time for that now, Sonny. We have important business. CRIME business.

...



Chicago? So he imports his stolen weapons?

Maybe. Or maybe there's a simpler explanation that's not stupid.



Let's go check on that phone number.

Oh, right, you have your own phone now.



And no, I am not going to make prank calls on it.

...how did you know?

It was pretty obvious.



Gun first.

Usually a good rule.



What do you know about a gun with the serial number SW9764912?

That weapon was reported stolen by a local nightclub owner. I guess it's your problem now!

What a nice man.

What about a man named Taselli?

Detective Taber says, "Oh, yes, we know your man, Jason Taselli, alias Hoffman, alias Pierson. He is linked to a big time card shark and drug runner named Jessie Bains. Both have dropped from sight in our area."

Bains, huh?

I'll send you a mug shot of this guy Bains. Good Luck!

Thanks.

Interesting. So he brought the gun with him from Chicago.

Looks like. Let's try the crime lab.



Hey, how do you know that number?

It's our crime lab. Of course I know it.

I didn't know it!

You could get it from 411, then.

I see.

Crime Lab, Detective Williams.

Williams, this is Bonds.



What were the results of the fingerprinting on that gun we got at the Hoffman traffic stop?

Yes, the prints on the gun matched that Hoffman/Taselli fellow. I heard he escaped!! Bye now...

Well, we already knew he did it.

Yeah, but it's nice to have corroboration.

Try that number the pusher from the park gave you.

I suppose it's worth a try.



Guess he wasn't home.

Out peddling dope, I suppose.

Or maybe "terminated".

Well, there's more than one way to skin a drug dealer. Let's go back to the computer for a minute.



The Delphoria. Wait a minute.

The anonymous tip in my pigeonhole. Illegal high-stakes gambling.

And Taselli was going to play poker with J.B.

Jesse Bains. His buddy from Chicago.

In the living room. With the automatic pistol.

...

Sorry, I was trying to help.

So it all ties back to the hotel. Let's go back to my desk for a minute and mull this over.



Sonny, just after you left, a hooker by the name of Sweet Cheeks Marie (who called you 'Precious'), called from the jail and said she needs to see you as soon as possible.

The jail? Oh, no.

Precious? PRECIOUS? HAHAHAHA

This is hardly the time or place to-

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

hahahaha

...

Come on, Sonny. You've got to admit that's kind of ridiculous. Anyway, I know you want to rush right over there, but, before you go to the jail, Morgan wants to see you.

Fine.

Anyway, Laura, you call him "Hot Rod" all the time.

Yeah, but that's only because it drives him nuts. See you later, boys!



Laura is the best cop.

...

...precious!

Shut up.



You wanted to see me, sir?

Hello, Sonny. I hear your 'little' Sweetheart is in the can!

Does... everyone at the station know about this now?

Don't worry, I'm sure they won't make fun of you and play jokes on you and generally make your life hell over it.

Sonny, I think your friend, Sweet Cheeks, may be able to help us out.

What?

What?

It seems our drug problem is emanating from the Hotel Delphoria.

Yes, we had worked that out as well.

You and Laura?

...sure, let's go with that.

In lieu of her current state of affairs, I'd bet Sweet Cheeks would be willing to help you establish your cover at the Hotel. Go over to the jail, and see if she'll help you with the hotel operation. When you get back, I'll hold a briefing on the operation.

Yes, sir. ...Thank you.

You're welcome, son. Well, what are you waiting for? I'll call the jail and arrange everything for you.



Your new boss is bailing out your girlfriend.

She is not my girlfriend.



That's because you haven't made a move on her yet.

Shut up.



...Sonny?



Really? You were JUST IN THIS CAR.



Got to make sure.

You're just trying to delay your trip to the prison. What, don't you want to see your girlfriend?



She is not my girlfriend! She's not even interested in me! Just lay off!

Sonny, are you some kind of complete idiot or something? She was practically slobbering on you in that bar. You're the first person she calls when she's in trouble. She calls you Precious, for God's sake! What is wrong with you!



She's just teasing me. She's always done that.

News flash! She is not teasing you! Like apparently every woman within a one-mile radius except Laura, she is trying to get into your pants!



Just leave me alone.

You'll see. Turn on your brain when you talk to her next time.



Shut up!

Yeah, dude, we're talking here.



No, we're not.

Fine, be that way.



Do your best to calm that girl down, will ya, Sonny? I don't get paid enough to listen to that crap!

Me neither, buddy.



Damn it.



Oh, Precious! I'm so happy to see you!

Eh? Eh?

Just shut up.

What?

Not you, Marie.

Please come here and talk to me! I need your help, Sonny.



I'm sorry, Sonny, but I got picked up by Operation Trick Trap.

Seriously. You could not pick a worse name for an operation.

I know you warned me, but I thought the operation was over.

It's okay, Marie. I understand.

I'll do anything to get out! Oh, Sonny! If only I had someone like you to call my own!



Sonny... what are you doing?



Oh, God, no. This is not what I meant! You two do realize you are in a prison, right?



Wow, Sweet Lips! Was that hot, or what?!

Sonny, that is without exception the worst thing you have ever said.

I'm sorry, Precious. I just couldn't resist you!

Maybe you could have resisted him for FIVE DAMNED MINUTES? Until you weren't in a prison?

Oh please, get me out of this place.




That's not even very subtle, is it?



Oh, God, not again. Stop that! Stop that right now! You're still in prison! Look, that gross pirate guy is RIGHT THERE! Is anyone even listening to me?



What did I just do?

Yeah, now you're getting it. Jesus Christ!

You explain the arrangements of Sweet Cheek's immediate release to her.

Sweet Cheeks, as soon as you're released, I want you to go to the police station for a meeting with Lieutenant Morgan.

Of course, Precious.



"Hey, Sonny!" says the jailer in a loud voice, "You been messing with my female prisoners or did you just start wearing lipstick today? Lt. Morgan just called. He's sending a car over for Sweet Cheeks."

Look how he assumes it was a female prisoner.



Sonny, what was that?

Just taking your advice. I made a move, didn't I?



Couldn't you have kept it in the holster a little longer in there, too? I didn't say you should grab her and start making out in the middle of the prison!

You know, there is absolutely nothing you could say that could possibly bother me right now.


Next time on Police Quest: Pimp my Protagonist!

Nope. Not even that.

Damn it!